Stop Running from Yourself

Ever came a situation in your life when you wanted to hide your face? Maybe from someone or from yourself? Yeah, it's hard to tell because you feel ashamed, frustrated, diffident and all other negative adjectives you can add on. At that moment you just simply have to hide.

So, you do things, like listening to your favorite playlist, talking to your best friend, maybe, trying to study, Cooking a recipe or anything that comforts you at that moment. Yes, distractions help a lot, keeping yourself busy is good.

But do you think that distraction will benefit you in any area? The answer to this question is NO, you have to stop running from the situations. You want to cry at the moment cry, write, talk whatever you feel like doing at that particular moment do that but stop running from yourself.

Earlier, it was not like this, you are thinking this now right? Yes situations differ. And you don't why this happens. You start resembling your older life with the new one.

You can't go back, but you can do something to bring it back. You are ashamed again because you are not able to recognize the problem because you have started distracting from the situation.

So how can you stop running and hiding from yourself? I have some ideas which might work for you.

RECOGNIZE
     Stop distracting yourself and don't take any instant action to your problem. You need your brain to work calmly, a paper-pen and silence. Think deeply, and write the root cause of your problem.

And a simple exercise to complete it is asking different 'why' questions to yourself like-

Why am I feeling bad? Because I can't concentrate on my daily work.

Why can't I focus on work? Because I am distracted.

Why I am distracted? Because I have so many thoughts going in my mind, whenever the notification pops up on my phone I have to check it out because the message is from the person whom I share my problems with. And this is happening because I feel unambitious and the work is not defined to me. This is a lot. Whenever I will through this questionnaire to myself eventually, I will word vomit and the feelings that are hitting me inside and distracting me and the solution will be on the table.

Congrats, this was only needed to define the problem, and that happened.

Let's see further what else we can do.

BREAK DOWN
     This to reflect. You just have to make a list of your problems listed in step 1. Let's see my list according to step1:-

• No interest at work 
• Pop up message from a friend 
• Lack of definition 
• Unambitious 

And so on, If you are okay with the list and you are getting your answer then step forward, otherwise go back and analyze each problem deeper and focus on your problem. Continue this until and unless you start feeling you can make your life, a whole better one.

IDENTIFICATION
     It's about control. Control over yourself and the emotions that have grabbed you. In the last two steps, you have defined, and break up your problems. Now is the time to figure out what the smallest thing you can do to improve those problems. Don't think you can do it in one perfect go instead list those task which is trivially easy, defined, and repeatable.

Our goal is to establish control over your problems.

Let's continue explaining this with our example.

Notifications: Turn off them. Turn off the phone.
Messaging Friends: When you have to share something journalize it on a paper and log off from the messaging app.
Unmotivated: Write what you want to most desire.
Undefined: Set a time limit and ask yourself just 10 more minutes.

Make those goals that can be easily won. We can achieve all those in just an hour or so by watching videos, listening to our favorite podcast but I will not to it altogether, instead, I will only;y solve one of my problems.

EXECUTE
     Don't run away, it's time to act. You just have to work upon the list you have identified. Whichever you find most interesting, easier, or most repeatable. If you are done with solving one problem then ask yourself Can I do one more? You don't have to participate in a marathon go slowly and solve it one by one.

Then ask Can I take one more step? If yes, then you would be surprised then by a single step you have achieved every solution.

After finding all the solutions I think I was running away from myself. Now I have started controlling my feelings, and I have managed to find pleasure and comfort.

Later on, I realized I have to face reality: nobody is going to confront me. Why stress about work? When you can just relax for 15 minutes. Why workout tonight when you are not in the mood. You can skip one day and change your daily routine. I want to achieve my goals and confront my problems. 'Achieving goals sounds good ' how to tackle it? There is so much to do. When I break into tiny tasks, it becomes much easier.

Have the courage to take the next step.

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